Great Start for July

Happy 5th of July to everyone!! I am sure each of you had a wicked bash to celebrate our independence. In honor of the founding fathers we blew stuff up!! Actually I did not but our great neighbors did around midnight. I went outside and shook my cane at them and told them to cut off that racket. I need my beauty sleep, this sweet piece of man candy does not just happen. I would like to announce that my wife and I celebrated our fifth anniversary on the 1st!!! Yeah that's right, she stayed for five years. I know some people owe me money. I actually believe that Karissa has not made a run for the border yet because she thinks I have a large inheritance coming to me. But don't tell her that there is nothing, it will be our little secret, hee hee. We saw the most romantic movie, "Hulk", isn't that sweet, the big green man is hitting everyone, reminds me of our wedding. Then Karissa got sick at dinner, and we went home early. I would have to say that this date is in my top five, well.........................
at least top ten. As for Mya, she is the noisest freakin' kid out there! I am not joking. We went to the mall and there was a ton of kids, and she blew them all away. Other than being a banshee she is adorable and fun. We also took her on the boat for the first time. Mya had fun, all the rest of us discovered that we are out of shape. My body said to me after the experience,"Oh, so you can't sit around for a year and then do activities. Dang, Twinkie the Kid lied to me!" Alright, it is off to bed for our little clan. One note, tonight after Karissa laid Mya down and was leaving, Mya rolled over and said, "See ya". She is a cute kid. Peace to all my peeps, both chicks and bunnies.

Oodles of Pictures in a week

My dear wife informed me that I was doing a insufficient job of posting pictures, so here are a gaggle. These pictures tell a lot of what we have been doing. We had Mya 's birthday numero uno on the 5th. Karissa made Mya the wicked butterfly cake. She ate with a spoon and was very methodical about the whole thing. I proceeded to recreate a dishwasher in cake form. I did this because the dishwasher is Mya's favorite toy. So you can check out the picture of our cakes, and yes there is a floor, rug, and plant made from fondant. Check out the pics of Mya jammin' on Rockstar!! If you are not excited that is fine, Mya will do it for you. The last picture is our band of misfits at my sister's wedding on the 7th. Along with all of this Father's Day just came around, and I got waffles!! My wife is totally awesome, and smokin' Hot!!!! So we have been busy as bees, minus making honey. Oh yeah, I am starting my own business doing video editing for weddings and stuff. So if anyone has videos they would like me to put together let me know. I did Kaiti's wedding video and it turned out great. Email if you want or tell all the people you ever meet and they can email me. Well thanks for reading and all of you go eat something, you look to thin.

Mya of the Carribean: Cursed Nipples of Fortune

I know I have slacked in my blogging efforts but ye behold, the World shall be blessed with another blog entry. There was much rejoicing!! As you can see from the video, Miss Mya is walking. Now she looks like a drunken sailor baby. Yo Ho, Yo Ho, a baby's life for me. Pass the bottle around but bring your own nipples! Well it is becoming spring and the weather is getting warmer, it also means that we are about a week away from Mya's 1st birthday. I would like to congratulate Mya on her perseverance through her first year of life. Not an easy job considering the father. If anyone wants to get her a present, then she really wants a new Macbook. I will post pictures of the wicked party that is going to go down. But goodbye for now, and a merry June to you all.

Donde esta la bibliotheque?

Hola to you all and a happy Cinco de Mayo!!! I am sure that you all have big plans involving tacos or queso in some form. This week I find myself in an interesting situation. Mya and I are alone for the whole week since Karissa is on a business trip to Ohio. Karissa told me that if Mya starts to walk when she is away, to push her down, and stop her. So this week I am on the look out to stunt any growth my child might make. One of the simple joy's of parenting. Mother's day is coming up and as some of you may recall the idea of womb candy was blogged about previously. Anyone that reads this needs to share with everyone else their ideas for their mom. Then we can compare to see who is a good child and who is not, it will be awesome. But before we even get to the Mom's, let us party with mucho ranchero musique y grande pinatas. Ole!!

Things that make you go Ha!!

If you did not laugh at the video then you may need to check your pulse. This is one of those videos that should be shared with everyone. The family and I went the zoo this last week. My favorite was the guys that brought beer and got smashed. Because you know, the zoo is better with a buzz. These are the kind of people that end up falling into the gorilla cage, and then they win money on Funniest Home Videos. Life makes sense once more. We also saw a baby left alone asleep in his stroller. We looked for the parents but nada. I guess they missed the class about keeping your infant with you when you walk. After we got security to get the kid to customer service (25 minutes later) the group of three people finally ran up. This is your feel good moment of the day. Also, everyone check out the cool search engine I put on the blog. Try it out, you can actually find things. I will end today by saying if your going to leave your child stranded anywhere, remember to take your nachos off the top of the stroller before you get too far.

A chair, to be or not to be?

I have been thinking what life would be like as a chair. You wouldn't really do much with yourself, but there in would lie the blessings of being a chair. What would everyone expect of you? To be a chair!! As said chair I would feel that I was truly being all that I could be. Since this has been my thought process for the last few days, I have accomplished as much as a chair would on a day to day basis. Life does indeed continue to rattle on and we are all partners on the love train that is our existence. Sweet Mya has discovered how to crawl under things. Now, my genius barricade of the coffee table is obsolete. But not to worry, I fixed the problem by shoving pillows under the table. Me smart do things good.
I will say that I wasted my time with a terrible movie called "The Invisible". I am so upset about watching it that I am warning anyone within the sound of my blog to stay away!! It was just so bad, like suck the life out of you bad. I am still recouping from this experience, and yes, you may send cards or balloons to help me get better. Well, everyone go now and be the best dang chair you could be, or a stool if your dream is to be such. But then you will get all the jokes from the chairs about stool samples and stuff, so you make the call.

I Have Returned!!!!!

After an extended void of posts I have finally returned!! Inspired by the vast readership of this blog I will now press forward and entertain you all. Well, we moved to Salt Lake City to get more smart. But the idea has since changed and I will not become known as Dr. Berndt. But anyone of you can call me that and I will still preform cheap surgery in my basement. Now I am the coolest stay at home Dad ever!! As I write this, Mya is busy playing with chemicals or some sharp object. Karissa is the winner of bread right now. So our life has thrown another fun curve. I feel like Moses, God said go that way with all my people, and he walked into the desert, smiling and skipping all the way, parting this and smiting that. Now, the Lord said to us, "Hey, go to Utah and become a doctor, it will be totally rad!" That is not a direct quote from God, because we all know that the Lord is hip and with it, so He would not use the word "rad".
I hope you all enjoy the Mya pictures. There will be more to come as I am going to attempt to make a posting either daily or every other day. Please come back and bring a friend because nobody should blog alone, it's just sad. Like that dog at the pound that you know no one is going to adopt. Sad, just sad.
Homework: Go adopt a pet.